Hello, I’m severely dyslexic, in the 60’s it was missed in school. 

My son a while back asked me to put down on paper some of the things we did and saw in the late 70’s, while I was in the 82nd.

Now that technology has essentially done away with dyslexia, I wanted to try my hand at writing some of these stories. Which I did, and they are a complete mess. So now I have to go back and learn how to form a correct sentence, any help with that would be appreciated. 

Before searching out live help, I spent some time on YouTube, so I know enough just to be dangerous.

 

What’s wrong with this sentence:

These weren’t the usual train blasts he heard at this intersection, this was rapid blasts alerting people to danger. 

Original Post

Hello, Al, and welcome to the Grammar Exchange.

Al posted:

What’s wrong with this sentence:

These weren’t the usual train blasts he heard at this intersection, this was rapid blasts alerting people to danger. 

Please notice that we do not provide proofreading services on our forum. However, I'll make an exception considering you are only asking about a sentence where, in my view, there are only a couple of mistakes:

- One is the comma splice separating two full sentences, which makes them a run-on sentence: you should write a dash, a semicolon, or a colon.

- Another is the singular "this was," which clearly contrasts with the plural "these weren't." I'd go with something like:

Those weren’t the usual train blasts he heard at that intersection -- those were rapid blasts alerting people to danger.

Thank you for your response.

“What’s wrong with this sentence:

These weren’t the usual train blasts he heard at this intersection, this was rapid blasts alerting people to danger.”

Oh I get it, “this” is singular, and I used it to reference the plural “these.

I went with this: -- they were rapid blasts alerting people to danger.

Sentence structure and punctuation seem to go hand-in-hand. But can or should these two be learned separately?

Just an observation here. Dyslexia, at least for me, doesn’t kick in when I read Koine Greek.  It’s the craziest thing.  I have no idea if it’s the hard fast pronunciation Greek has. The different shapes of the letters, or what. The change of reading and writing between the two languages for me is striking. It’s almost like dyslexia is wired for a certain language.

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